Most people learn from their parents, whether it is how to treat people, what to eat or their perspective on life. Even grandparents have a huge impact on children. They are also modeling positivity.
I vividly remember my former father-in-law stated out loud, “No, we don’t do that.” He was not referring to whether is was okay to lie, cheat or steal. He was referring to eating a donut! I am not kidding. Even my kids at the time laughed at the absurdity of it!
Later I realized my former spouse had adopted his parent’s attitude. I think of it as having “NO” as your default answer. He used to say, “No. We can’t go on vacation because…”
Every possibility had an excuse. He was stuck in negativity and now I see why. It was a learned response from his childhood. He was taught to look at life negatively or with a feeling of lack, versus a life of possibilities and abundance.
I can totally relate to this type of upbringing as one of my parents had the negativity view too! Luckily, my other parent was optimistic.
Only as an adult can I now identify what our parents were instilling in us. They were teaching us to have limited beliefs. They were modeling behavior to keep us stifled, never reaching our dreams. They were teaching us that we have to "settle" in life and not to try too hard as whatever we want is unattainable.
Can you imagine how the world would change in one generation if parents changed the behavior they modeled for their children? What if parents only fed their children positive statements, encouraging words, and told them they could do anything they wanted?
Some people do raise kids like this, and you probably know some of them. They are the ones who throw caution to the wind, make plans, do the work, and achieve great things in life. This is what happens when children grow up in a positive environment, believing in a “world of possibilities.”
Trying to speak positively is harder than you might think. We often say we don’t want this or that, instead of stating what we do want. Even saying what you don’t want is a negative statement.
Let’s all try to speak and act more positively in our daily actions. We can learn to reframe our words from negative to positive. We might need to talk to our inner child in a more positive tone, since many of us have negative self-talk.
Let’s model positive behavior for our children, grandchildren, and our friends. Let’s keep things positive until it is our natural response; until it becomes automatic.
Let this behavior be contagious! In one generation we could wipe our negativity! What a goal to strive for!
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